Thursday, July 29, 2010

How did you tell your spouse that you wanted a divorce?

I'm not getting divorced, but that just seems like it would be a tough conversation to start. How did they react?How did you tell your spouse that you wanted a divorce?
I said, ';how long are we going to live like this?'; he said, ';I don't know'; I said, ';I know...I'm not living like this one more week, one more month, one more year.'; then I went and filed for divorce; it's been 17 years and he's still in a stupor.....geezHow did you tell your spouse that you wanted a divorce?
Errr... the police kinda told him for me.


HE called them, on me, when he woke up at about 8am, still hammered from the night before. They came, assessed the situation, and helped me and my son get out to a shelter.


They had to go back in the house and fight him to get the carseat, too.


I seriously had had many talks, over years, but that action took support to happen. I put myself second to him, until I had a baby to put first, and even then I could not have dialed the police myself that day.


How did he react... 2 years of custody battles, then 24 counts of restraining order violations, resulting in 2 years probation, zero visitation or contact with his child, still lives at home with his mother, unemployed and drinking, at age 41. Totaled her car DUI, too.


How did I react... got a 2nd college diploma, a decent job, a rental, a better job, and am now a homeowner.


He always told me I'd be nothing without him. :-)
HA! i hated him so much it was easy.... first, i left for another state with my best friend to get myself together... then, 2 months later, i came back, w/o telling him, and he had been staying with family so he wouldnt be alone.. so, i called him and told him his stuff was out on the frint porch and i was divorcing him... i think he saw it coming, he didnt act surprised... he did try to get me back a few times, but the only reason i answered the phone was because i didnt recognise the # calling me...
I left him a voicemail on his cell phone. He was about an hour and a half away when he got into range to get the message. I figured that would give me the time I needed to get everything out from the house that I needed. I didn't take much, just clothes and some dishes. He was hunting for the weekend and I had enough of my life with him. He used to threaten suicide if I left or leave me weepy messages on my phone if I tried to talk to him about our problems. I was married to him for 24 years. He was online the very next day looking for dates. I waited for over 6 months. Different strokes I guess. I am remarried and happy 4 years later, he still struggles with relationships.
After the second time I found out she cheated, I told her I couldn't deal with it and that we were over. It got rough for a while, she did some crazy azz stuff. Yelled, left vulgar message on my voice mail, told our kids I was an F-ing azzhole. Took many sleeping pills with alcohol and ran amok in a local elementary school... Best choice I made in my life. I should have left the first time she got caught cheating.
i told her at first, so we could correct the problems we where having, then after a few months of separation, i would try to see what her thoughts and feeling where about us, and she said its up in the air..then a week after our would anniversary she said she was in love and moving in with someone else.that's all i needed to hear, so i filed....
I think that I would just pack up and leave one day while he was at work.





I hope that when he got home and saw that me and the kids and all our stuff was missing he would get the clue.





I could never have ';that talk';
That will never happen in our house. My wife and I have an agreement. The first one to ask for a divorce has to take the kids!
Just tell the truth we can make life so difficult with things that are really not hard. Be honest don't be afraid. Pray for wisdom God bless you
We were separated because of a big fight. After another large battle, I just had her served.
He just told me start up and said he didn't love me anymore.





It hurt, take another route.
Just tell them.....Resulted in violence and a restraining order.
I just started packing my clothes, he got the hint.
JUST TOLD HIM ';I WANT A DIVORCE!';



Tell them.
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