This will be our second deployment, and we have three young children. The first deployment was hell because I was alone in Missouri with no family or friends. The next deployment will be at least six months, and my parents want me and the kids to come and stay with them. What is the best thing to do, and why?What are the benefits of going to stay with family during a spouse's deployment?
your family is your best support (and they probably noticed how bad it was last time and care, thats why they asked you) so i would go stay with them.What are the benefits of going to stay with family during a spouse's deployment?
Stay. You can always fly over to visit. Moving children allot, even young ones, is not good for them. They need stability.
Grew up in a military town. Lots of kids came and went in the school and they had 2 things in common. 1. they made friends easily 2. they were still distant and were weird with some off things.
It'll take your mind off of things and if you get really stressed out you can leave the kids with your family to go away on a spa trip. My boyfriend's father was just deployed for 6 months. It really helps to have a good support system and to know people who go threw the same thing.
go to family for and support
Thursday, July 29, 2010
How do you tell your spouse your ready for a divorce?
My husband and I have been having a lot of problems lately. I'm tired of trying to fix things because I see no effort coming from him. Now all I really want to do is get a divorce. How do I tell him?How do you tell your spouse your ready for a divorce?
Let your lawyer do it for you.How do you tell your spouse your ready for a divorce?
get a lawyer and serve the papers
You should tell him that the both of you need to see a marriage therapist.
Text message
If your serious, just file and let the paper work he receives in the mail do the talking.
I AM IN THE PLAYPEN WITH SWEET MILDRED.
CRAWL INTO OUR SECRET SOCIETY.
Get yourself Counseling, and then work on your issues.
sit down and talk slowly and cut the line gently if he's still in love with you if not text him and send a notice from your solicitor.
Did you try counseling??? If not get your money situated and get a lawyer...It may get ugly. Just prepare!!
Talk to him about the lack of effort you see in him. This is a common problem that can be solved with just a little communication! Don't you want to try and make your marriage work before you run and get a quickie divorce?
Sit him down and just explain to him that you do love him very much but you don't feel you are both as a happy as you were previously and things are getting worse instead of better. Offer to try marriage concouling.
Just tell him. I told mine I wanted one this morning. He did not even argue about just said O.K.
Sit down %26amp; talk it out
Maybe your hubby already sensed it coming
Its better to just tell him now than to just wait......wait for things to get better
He should know now so you two can come to senses
Tell him you need to talk to him...and tell him you want out.
If he's not putting effort in...then chances are, he wants out too. It may not be too bad of a conversation. Keep it respectful. Keep it to the point.
If you guys agree, it'll be way less money...And less trauma to you both.
Good luck!
Just serve him with the paperwork. There is no point in talking about it. What is going to happen? he says no, please dont and you say yes or ok I will wait only for things to get bad again? The cycle repeats itself - trust me. Just get the papers and ask him to sign.
If it has gotten that bad I think that he might already know. He just doesn't want to be the first to bring up divorce. I would just go to him and be open and honest about your feelings and move forward from there. Everyone deserves to be happy. Good Luck!
Print this question and hand it to him. You did a wonderful of voicing your opinion.
First you need to make sure that is really what you want to do because sometimes marriages can be rocky but that's where the thick and thin come in at because you have to try to get on one accord to make things work.I am married and sometimes my husband get me so mad where I scream out divorce but when I calm down I know that was only out of frustration,BUT! If you are really serious about getting a divorce you should go to your husband like a women and tell him that its not working out because you done see him trying to make a eff fort to make things better so you want a divorce.of-course he will ask you why and try to beg you not to but if you heart is not in the marriage anymore you should get a divorce just make sure your not just saying that out of anger.
Good luck
Tell him just like you placed it here. Its simple, quick, and its a good way to break the ice on this situation. You may want to put a couple examples, so we now what are you trying to say. Sometimes both men, and women, only like to see one side of things, they don't like to see the other side, or even the middle of everything. Maybe he doesn't try for the same reason, he has asked for thing from you, but you don't put your part in it. You say you are tired of trying to fix a (long or short) marriage, but why do you really want to divorce him?
Sometimes, a divorce is an excuse the mind tells you to do for other reasons...
I would just say, ';It's time to separate. I'm 100% done and there is nothing you can do to change my mind.'; I'm almost to that point with my husband and WHEN I get there that is how I am going to tell him.
You don't have to tell him. Just go file for divorce and have him served. He will be able to figure it out.
Do it quick. I f the relationship is over stop being selfish and end it. If your feelings for him have changed why are you hanging on. When my ex tried to end things 8 year before he finally left I tried to fix things over and over, like I said he did leave. I should have let him , I allowed him to waste 8 more years of my life when he was unhappy I should have let him go. So my point is if you are unhappy and have been thinking about divorce , let him go. Give him a chance to get on with his life. My ex took all my youth and through it away. I wish I would have let him go years before. That old ';It's not you it's me'; is a load of crap. Tell him it's both of you. You just don't want the same things any more and you want to move on and allow him to do the same. That you both deserve to be loved and happy and your not either.
hope this helps
I like Yolanda's answers. She very down to earth and mature. I tink she right, he already know.make up brushes makeup hair
Let your lawyer do it for you.How do you tell your spouse your ready for a divorce?
get a lawyer and serve the papers
You should tell him that the both of you need to see a marriage therapist.
Text message
If your serious, just file and let the paper work he receives in the mail do the talking.
I AM IN THE PLAYPEN WITH SWEET MILDRED.
CRAWL INTO OUR SECRET SOCIETY.
Get yourself Counseling, and then work on your issues.
sit down and talk slowly and cut the line gently if he's still in love with you if not text him and send a notice from your solicitor.
Did you try counseling??? If not get your money situated and get a lawyer...It may get ugly. Just prepare!!
Talk to him about the lack of effort you see in him. This is a common problem that can be solved with just a little communication! Don't you want to try and make your marriage work before you run and get a quickie divorce?
Sit him down and just explain to him that you do love him very much but you don't feel you are both as a happy as you were previously and things are getting worse instead of better. Offer to try marriage concouling.
Just tell him. I told mine I wanted one this morning. He did not even argue about just said O.K.
Sit down %26amp; talk it out
Maybe your hubby already sensed it coming
Its better to just tell him now than to just wait......wait for things to get better
He should know now so you two can come to senses
Tell him you need to talk to him...and tell him you want out.
If he's not putting effort in...then chances are, he wants out too. It may not be too bad of a conversation. Keep it respectful. Keep it to the point.
If you guys agree, it'll be way less money...And less trauma to you both.
Good luck!
Just serve him with the paperwork. There is no point in talking about it. What is going to happen? he says no, please dont and you say yes or ok I will wait only for things to get bad again? The cycle repeats itself - trust me. Just get the papers and ask him to sign.
If it has gotten that bad I think that he might already know. He just doesn't want to be the first to bring up divorce. I would just go to him and be open and honest about your feelings and move forward from there. Everyone deserves to be happy. Good Luck!
Print this question and hand it to him. You did a wonderful of voicing your opinion.
First you need to make sure that is really what you want to do because sometimes marriages can be rocky but that's where the thick and thin come in at because you have to try to get on one accord to make things work.I am married and sometimes my husband get me so mad where I scream out divorce but when I calm down I know that was only out of frustration,BUT! If you are really serious about getting a divorce you should go to your husband like a women and tell him that its not working out because you done see him trying to make a eff fort to make things better so you want a divorce.of-course he will ask you why and try to beg you not to but if you heart is not in the marriage anymore you should get a divorce just make sure your not just saying that out of anger.
Good luck
Tell him just like you placed it here. Its simple, quick, and its a good way to break the ice on this situation. You may want to put a couple examples, so we now what are you trying to say. Sometimes both men, and women, only like to see one side of things, they don't like to see the other side, or even the middle of everything. Maybe he doesn't try for the same reason, he has asked for thing from you, but you don't put your part in it. You say you are tired of trying to fix a (long or short) marriage, but why do you really want to divorce him?
Sometimes, a divorce is an excuse the mind tells you to do for other reasons...
I would just say, ';It's time to separate. I'm 100% done and there is nothing you can do to change my mind.'; I'm almost to that point with my husband and WHEN I get there that is how I am going to tell him.
You don't have to tell him. Just go file for divorce and have him served. He will be able to figure it out.
Do it quick. I f the relationship is over stop being selfish and end it. If your feelings for him have changed why are you hanging on. When my ex tried to end things 8 year before he finally left I tried to fix things over and over, like I said he did leave. I should have let him , I allowed him to waste 8 more years of my life when he was unhappy I should have let him go. So my point is if you are unhappy and have been thinking about divorce , let him go. Give him a chance to get on with his life. My ex took all my youth and through it away. I wish I would have let him go years before. That old ';It's not you it's me'; is a load of crap. Tell him it's both of you. You just don't want the same things any more and you want to move on and allow him to do the same. That you both deserve to be loved and happy and your not either.
hope this helps
I like Yolanda's answers. She very down to earth and mature. I tink she right, he already know.
What do you tell a spouse or significant other to get in shape with you?
I am working out and building muscle and my boyfriend is not. How do i motivate him to work out with me?What do you tell a spouse or significant other to get in shape with you?
It's easier when a couple does it together. My husband and I work out together. Don't force the issue, he'll see how great you're doing..he might get motivated. It's something he's going to have to do for himself. Buy a subscription to Muscle and Fitness or Men's Fitness..and that will motivate him!
send him to Testosterone nation.com great site!What do you tell a spouse or significant other to get in shape with you?
tell him you wanna be more active and healthy and you need his support and it would be a diff. way to spend time together... or you could just say dude.. ur belly is big.. ahhaa j/k .. i'm doing the same thing with my man. i just told him we could motivate each other
Give him sex treats when he loses a couple of pounds...other than that he actually has to want to do it himself
You can't make someone lose weight or get in shape. They have to want to do it. But you can do things that he might not realize, such as dragging him on walks, suggesting hiking/camping trips, taking your bikes instead of the car, little one on one basketball, swimming. If your general concerned for his health I would have a heart to heart with him about the benefits of eating better and being fit.
If your boyfriend doesnt want to work out then no amount of nagging will make him,it will only put a wedge between you.
I go to keep fit twice a week and swimming once a week with my friend but i wouldnt ask my partner to come with me coz i know he wouldnt and to try and make him will only cause problems so if your boyfriend doesnt want to exercise then let him be.
christy
I have this problem myself. One good way is to start buying healthier food. Also, start doing exercising as a couple activity.
Like playing basketball together or something like that. So he may not see it as an exercise.
It's easier when a couple does it together. My husband and I work out together. Don't force the issue, he'll see how great you're doing..he might get motivated. It's something he's going to have to do for himself. Buy a subscription to Muscle and Fitness or Men's Fitness..and that will motivate him!
send him to Testosterone nation.com great site!What do you tell a spouse or significant other to get in shape with you?
tell him you wanna be more active and healthy and you need his support and it would be a diff. way to spend time together... or you could just say dude.. ur belly is big.. ahhaa j/k .. i'm doing the same thing with my man. i just told him we could motivate each other
Give him sex treats when he loses a couple of pounds...other than that he actually has to want to do it himself
You can't make someone lose weight or get in shape. They have to want to do it. But you can do things that he might not realize, such as dragging him on walks, suggesting hiking/camping trips, taking your bikes instead of the car, little one on one basketball, swimming. If your general concerned for his health I would have a heart to heart with him about the benefits of eating better and being fit.
If your boyfriend doesnt want to work out then no amount of nagging will make him,it will only put a wedge between you.
I go to keep fit twice a week and swimming once a week with my friend but i wouldnt ask my partner to come with me coz i know he wouldnt and to try and make him will only cause problems so if your boyfriend doesnt want to exercise then let him be.
christy
I have this problem myself. One good way is to start buying healthier food. Also, start doing exercising as a couple activity.
Like playing basketball together or something like that. So he may not see it as an exercise.
How do you and your spouse find ways/time to be intimate with small children around?
And how do you keep things spicy? We don't have children yet, but I've heard of so many marriages having intimacy problems once children come into the picture.How do you and your spouse find ways/time to be intimate with small children around?
For us the key is we are very strict and consistent parents. We interact with our children, we play with them and spend time with them, but we understand and committ to spend time with each other. In order to mantain our relationship solid, we need to start from us. This is where many couples fail, putting kids first. It sounds selfish, but it`s not. The only way you can keep a family together and stable is by starting from the relationship, the foundation is the couple.
We put our children to bed at 8pm every night, once in a while we let them stay up for weekends, and they do as told because we`re raising respectful children under very good family values.
Nights are the best time for us to be intimate and keep our relationship good for ourselves. Once a year we go on a trip just the two, with the help of my mother. I know many couples don`t have this luxury, but we do and take advantage to bring back the sparks.How do you and your spouse find ways/time to be intimate with small children around?
It takes some planning. Teaching kids at 3-4 that they need to knock on their parents' door at night helps. Locking the door is a must, of course.
Opportunities for spontaneous sex during the day do get harder to come by, but keeping an eye out for the odd opportunity becomes second nature! Trying to have lots of good sex is important, and surprising each other when it's safe to do so is a must, in my opinion!
Once the kids are in school, it does get easier, especially if you work locally!
This is why it's important for couples to have a separate room for the kids and babies to sleep in. Too many couples get into the bad habit of letting the kids sleep with them and then the kids literally come between the husband and wife.
Get the kids on a schedule and put them to bed and when available allow them to spend the night with friends or relatives.
Well, children do sleep....
Also, a good bedroom lock comes in quite handy. :)
It's not impossible if you make time with each other a priority. You learn that other things in life aren't that important (example..we watch very little tv) and if you keep in mind that a happy marriage is the best foundation for parenting it's easy to be creative.
The issue often is that hubby feels replaced. intamacy is easy get to swapping with friends ill take yours for 2 hours on thurs you take mine on wneds and now you got fun time with no kiddies. also little ones sleep ALOT let them sleep with a small radio or cd player going and they get used to a little back ground noise and my boys sleep through anything. Spicy??? well define spicy its gonna depend on what thrills you and what doesnt if your sex life is good now then do that LOL.
Our daughter is 14 months and co sleeps a lot so we stick her in bed and then make our little den bit on the living room floor. We have a duvet and loads of pillows and then we sit in the living room watching tv and having sex. You can get from 8pm onwards to yourself so loads of time for sex whilst your child is in bed
Trust me you'll find ways. We schedule date nights once a week, at least we used to until we moved to a different state a month ago, we don't know anybody here! But we have a two year old and we still have pretty hot sex. We do it as often as we did before she came along, and we do it in all the same places. We just have to wait until she's sleeping and spray everything down with Lysol! lol
If a child has his/her own room there is NO need for there to be a problem for a couple to be intimate. The couples you describe do not know how to create rules and boundaries for their kids. I have 4 kids and I have NEVER had problems getting intimate with my partner because they we're home.
My Husband and I make a point of ';date'; night once a month. My Mom (Grandma) takes them for one night. We go out to dinner, talk, reconnect, go home and have some fun. Of course when the kids are in bed at night we have our time. There is always enough time to be intimate. You have to make sure there is always enough room for your marriage. Its called balance.
We are in our 20's and we have 2 kids. We get it on a few times a week. We just put them to bed around 8 every night and turn the lights down low bay bay~
You have to make time or you will always have an excuse to put it off
The good news is that they go to bed early, and take naps.
The bad news is that they wear you out and you end up going to bed early and taking naps.
There will be some frustration, but you will work it out.
That's just an excuse that people use. Trust me, it's a lot easier than you think. Yeah, it sucks because you will be tired from chasing kids around all day but you have to make yourself do it to keep your marriage close.
ha ha not mine we have 6 kids together and were good
that's what your room is for close the door and lock it and tell the kids when this door is closed
do not come knocking unles its ur bleeding or something like that lol
ha ha
When the kids are in bed...or sometimes when they are engrossed in a movie...just be sure you lock the door, you don't want to hear your child say ';why is daddy naked'; in the middle of it:)
Young children should be in bed by 8PM.
Supernanny has a great ';stay in bed'; technique.
When they were little the kids used to go to bed at 8.
Ever try turning the TV off? Suddenly you find yourself with 3 hours before 11 and nothing to do but get busy.
wear a mini skirt without undies - drop something on the floor and he can just come up behind you and do the nasty while he says - ';I am helping mommy pick that up';
Babies take naps and sleep dont they? Hand them off to grandma a few times a month and have some steamy nights alone. Stop making excuses.
When the kids are sleeping! :) just make sure you lock the door though! because you don't want them to walk in on you! and don't be to loud!
Try greasing the bedroom doorknob.
It isn't just finding time, it's finding the energy!
We usually reserve our love making for when the kids are all in bed, sometimes if he is home when the kids are at school. if the love romance attraction and desire is there than you will need no help keeping things spiced up!
wait till the kids are asleep then get into it
shut the door
babies ruin good people.
im not sure maybe get some alone time??
We make thursday night our Night. If you dont make the time it wont ever happen..
For us the key is we are very strict and consistent parents. We interact with our children, we play with them and spend time with them, but we understand and committ to spend time with each other. In order to mantain our relationship solid, we need to start from us. This is where many couples fail, putting kids first. It sounds selfish, but it`s not. The only way you can keep a family together and stable is by starting from the relationship, the foundation is the couple.
We put our children to bed at 8pm every night, once in a while we let them stay up for weekends, and they do as told because we`re raising respectful children under very good family values.
Nights are the best time for us to be intimate and keep our relationship good for ourselves. Once a year we go on a trip just the two, with the help of my mother. I know many couples don`t have this luxury, but we do and take advantage to bring back the sparks.How do you and your spouse find ways/time to be intimate with small children around?
It takes some planning. Teaching kids at 3-4 that they need to knock on their parents' door at night helps. Locking the door is a must, of course.
Opportunities for spontaneous sex during the day do get harder to come by, but keeping an eye out for the odd opportunity becomes second nature! Trying to have lots of good sex is important, and surprising each other when it's safe to do so is a must, in my opinion!
Once the kids are in school, it does get easier, especially if you work locally!
This is why it's important for couples to have a separate room for the kids and babies to sleep in. Too many couples get into the bad habit of letting the kids sleep with them and then the kids literally come between the husband and wife.
Get the kids on a schedule and put them to bed and when available allow them to spend the night with friends or relatives.
Well, children do sleep....
Also, a good bedroom lock comes in quite handy. :)
It's not impossible if you make time with each other a priority. You learn that other things in life aren't that important (example..we watch very little tv) and if you keep in mind that a happy marriage is the best foundation for parenting it's easy to be creative.
The issue often is that hubby feels replaced. intamacy is easy get to swapping with friends ill take yours for 2 hours on thurs you take mine on wneds and now you got fun time with no kiddies. also little ones sleep ALOT let them sleep with a small radio or cd player going and they get used to a little back ground noise and my boys sleep through anything. Spicy??? well define spicy its gonna depend on what thrills you and what doesnt if your sex life is good now then do that LOL.
Our daughter is 14 months and co sleeps a lot so we stick her in bed and then make our little den bit on the living room floor. We have a duvet and loads of pillows and then we sit in the living room watching tv and having sex. You can get from 8pm onwards to yourself so loads of time for sex whilst your child is in bed
Trust me you'll find ways. We schedule date nights once a week, at least we used to until we moved to a different state a month ago, we don't know anybody here! But we have a two year old and we still have pretty hot sex. We do it as often as we did before she came along, and we do it in all the same places. We just have to wait until she's sleeping and spray everything down with Lysol! lol
If a child has his/her own room there is NO need for there to be a problem for a couple to be intimate. The couples you describe do not know how to create rules and boundaries for their kids. I have 4 kids and I have NEVER had problems getting intimate with my partner because they we're home.
My Husband and I make a point of ';date'; night once a month. My Mom (Grandma) takes them for one night. We go out to dinner, talk, reconnect, go home and have some fun. Of course when the kids are in bed at night we have our time. There is always enough time to be intimate. You have to make sure there is always enough room for your marriage. Its called balance.
We are in our 20's and we have 2 kids. We get it on a few times a week. We just put them to bed around 8 every night and turn the lights down low bay bay~
You have to make time or you will always have an excuse to put it off
The good news is that they go to bed early, and take naps.
The bad news is that they wear you out and you end up going to bed early and taking naps.
There will be some frustration, but you will work it out.
That's just an excuse that people use. Trust me, it's a lot easier than you think. Yeah, it sucks because you will be tired from chasing kids around all day but you have to make yourself do it to keep your marriage close.
ha ha not mine we have 6 kids together and were good
that's what your room is for close the door and lock it and tell the kids when this door is closed
do not come knocking unles its ur bleeding or something like that lol
ha ha
When the kids are in bed...or sometimes when they are engrossed in a movie...just be sure you lock the door, you don't want to hear your child say ';why is daddy naked'; in the middle of it:)
Young children should be in bed by 8PM.
Supernanny has a great ';stay in bed'; technique.
When they were little the kids used to go to bed at 8.
Ever try turning the TV off? Suddenly you find yourself with 3 hours before 11 and nothing to do but get busy.
wear a mini skirt without undies - drop something on the floor and he can just come up behind you and do the nasty while he says - ';I am helping mommy pick that up';
Babies take naps and sleep dont they? Hand them off to grandma a few times a month and have some steamy nights alone. Stop making excuses.
When the kids are sleeping! :) just make sure you lock the door though! because you don't want them to walk in on you! and don't be to loud!
Try greasing the bedroom doorknob.
It isn't just finding time, it's finding the energy!
We usually reserve our love making for when the kids are all in bed, sometimes if he is home when the kids are at school. if the love romance attraction and desire is there than you will need no help keeping things spiced up!
wait till the kids are asleep then get into it
shut the door
babies ruin good people.
im not sure maybe get some alone time??
We make thursday night our Night. If you dont make the time it wont ever happen..
How long does it take to receive a refund when filing injured spouse?
I filed 2/14 and turbo tax said I should see a refund 2/27. Still no refund or info. When I called the IRS, they said it takes longer when you file an injured spouse (12 weeks?). Is that accurate or is the worst scenario? How long should I expect to wait?How long does it take to receive a refund when filing injured spouse?
When you attach Form 8379 to your return the total processing time is 11 to 14 weeks. If you file after the fact it takes 6 to 8 weeks after your tax return is processed to release any refund. This works out to about the same total amount of time needed for processing either way.
If you filed on 2/14, don't expect to see any refund before early May and possibly early June.How long does it take to receive a refund when filing injured spouse?
Sorry, but that's the way it works. TFTP.
When you attach Form 8379 to your return the total processing time is 11 to 14 weeks. If you file after the fact it takes 6 to 8 weeks after your tax return is processed to release any refund. This works out to about the same total amount of time needed for processing either way.
If you filed on 2/14, don't expect to see any refund before early May and possibly early June.How long does it take to receive a refund when filing injured spouse?
Sorry, but that's the way it works. TFTP.
Report Abuse
How many times can a spouse complain about laundry before one can call in an air-strike?
Thank you for taking my poll. I don't like laundry, and you probably care deeply to know that yet didn't bring Cheez-Whiz.How many times can a spouse complain about laundry before one can call in an air-strike?
After the 3rd complaint is launched and due to the abbreviated trajectory, I'm thinking your weapon of choice would be a shoulder-fired rocket launcher.... more accurate at close range.
After all, why take the whole house out, when only the laundry room is necessary?How many times can a spouse complain about laundry before one can call in an air-strike?
You know, I'm weird.
I don't mind laundry.
I don't mind washing it.
I don't mind drying it.
I don't mind folding it.
BUT I DETEST PUTTING IT AWAY. Is that not the weirdest thing? I wash it, dry it, fold it, and then leave it all on the bed and ask my husband to put it away. Lol. I don't know why, I just hate putting it all in the drawers, and hanging up the shirts. Ugh.
i use to wash my fiance's clothes sometimes, but stopped all together because he kept complaining. i havent washed his clothes in 1 1/2 years,...and yes, he still washes mine at time--i dont complain.
the spouse should not have to complain about the laundry,the mate should have it done correctly.
You know, that's how the first Gulf War started.
Bush Snr got real sick of Saddam always dumping a bag of dirty laundry on the White House steps every Sunday afternoon.
*cries*
I don't particularly love doing laundry...but I hate even more having my family wearing dirty clothes....
With all the kids we have, laundry is done everyday no matter if we feel like doing it or not... and yes, I said ';we'; because my husband helps me with all the housework.
I don't like laundry either.
He he wants clean undies, he can wash them by his damn self:)
I don't get what the big deal is about laundry. It's not like it's that hard or time consuming!
I say if you're going to complain.... DO IT YOURSELF....
Lmao...Thanx..
After the 3rd complaint is launched and due to the abbreviated trajectory, I'm thinking your weapon of choice would be a shoulder-fired rocket launcher.... more accurate at close range.
After all, why take the whole house out, when only the laundry room is necessary?How many times can a spouse complain about laundry before one can call in an air-strike?
You know, I'm weird.
I don't mind laundry.
I don't mind washing it.
I don't mind drying it.
I don't mind folding it.
BUT I DETEST PUTTING IT AWAY. Is that not the weirdest thing? I wash it, dry it, fold it, and then leave it all on the bed and ask my husband to put it away. Lol. I don't know why, I just hate putting it all in the drawers, and hanging up the shirts. Ugh.
i use to wash my fiance's clothes sometimes, but stopped all together because he kept complaining. i havent washed his clothes in 1 1/2 years,...and yes, he still washes mine at time--i dont complain.
the spouse should not have to complain about the laundry,the mate should have it done correctly.
You know, that's how the first Gulf War started.
Bush Snr got real sick of Saddam always dumping a bag of dirty laundry on the White House steps every Sunday afternoon.
*cries*
I don't particularly love doing laundry...but I hate even more having my family wearing dirty clothes....
With all the kids we have, laundry is done everyday no matter if we feel like doing it or not... and yes, I said ';we'; because my husband helps me with all the housework.
I don't like laundry either.
He he wants clean undies, he can wash them by his damn self:)
I don't get what the big deal is about laundry. It's not like it's that hard or time consuming!
I say if you're going to complain.... DO IT YOURSELF....
Lmao...Thanx..
How do you know your spouse really loves you?
I mean we get so comfortable in a relationship and sometimes we forgive things we shouldn't? We're either to scare to move on or we're just too comfortable financially or emotionally accept that it's okay to be mistreated or ignored or taken advantage of. How do we know our spouses really love us?How do you know your spouse really loves you?
For me, i know my wife loves me because she does a lot of things for me without me asking. And i do that for her as well. We work together, never need to be nagged. We have sex very regularly. Both of us initiate at times so it isn't one sided. We never let each other down. When one needs the other for whatever reason, we are there. To me, all that is love. if they need to be reminded ot be thoughtful of you, or nagged ot be sweet and make love ot you, or find excuses not to come thru, then you can probably question the love in that relationship. Love isn't work. I don't work a day in my life to be with her. It's easy. She is a part of me. So doing for her, is like doing for me.How do you know your spouse really loves you?
You can't ever know.
People can lie. Even to themselves. Many people convince themselves they're in love with someone, because they can't stand the idea of being alone. (or what being alone implies: loser).
The key is: you decide what you will tolerate and what you will not. If you're being abused - it does not matter if you love them or they love you. You MUST protect yourself.
So - ask yourself the following things:
1. Does your spouse ever show GENUINE concern for other people's feelings? (even animals). If the answer is yes, then your spouse is not a psychopath. That's a good thing.
2. Does your spouse try to manipulate others? (lying is a big indicator here, but using sex, or other reward/punishment mechanisms is very indicative of manipulation).
3. Does your spouse abuse you, or others, (or substances, alcohol, drugs), physically, emotionally, verbally? (including - especially cheating). Basically, are they a bully?
If the answer to either of the last two is yes, then it's very likely that they have a damaged ego, and are primarily motivated by fear - and they may believe firmly that they love you, and swear they do, but trust me, they do not. Manipulators and abusers hate themselves. They are pathologically incapable of loving others.
This condition IS curable. Codpendency and Addiction recovery are good programs that can teach someone how to rebuild self esteem. When they love themselves, they can really love others. Of course, this is very oversimplified, and there are a lot of other personality disorder issues or mental illness that can complicate things.
Psychopathy is NOT curable. If the answer to question 1 is no, then get out of there, run like hell.
re: I mean we get so comfortable in a relationship and sometimes we forgive things we shouldn't?
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; That's called CODEPENDENCY.......an ILLNESS! Relationships are more about finding solutions to problems than STUPIDLY forgiving (only to have it happen again and again and again with no solution - ever!)
We're either to scare to move on or we're just too comfortable financially or emotionally accept that it's okay to be mistreated or ignored or taken advantage of.
%26gt;%26gt; And that is a perfect description of CODEPENDENCY!
http://www.google.com/search?client=oper鈥?/a>
....don't worry - it's cureable!
How do we know our spouses really love us?
%26gt;%26gt; You don't! All you will ever know is that it is working or not - depending on your level of relationship skills and KNOWLEDGE. When it's working, you will know.
When he stops at Starbucks on his way home from work to bring you a caramel macchiato, because he knows I won't spend $5 on a coffee for myself.
Or when you wake up at 10 a.m. on a Saturday, because he got up, turned off your alarm, fed the kids and took the dogs out so that you could sleep in.
Little things...just all the little things matter at that point in the relationship...more so than words.
My husband is constantly complementing me.
He is always there for rme no matter what.
He tells me everyday more than once how much he loves me.
He would do anything reasonable that I would ask him to do.
He helps out around the house.
really everything about him tells me that he loves me..And vice versa
Remember, love is a verb, not a feeling. One must actively love someone or they begin to take the companionship for granted. If the two of you are Christians, grab the book The Love Dare. It truly changed my wife's and my relationship for the better.
When he does things on a regular basis that he knows will make you happy. When he has your back and you have his. Our house is the soft place to land at the end of the day.
They show you daily.
They hug you.
THey say i love you often.
They desire you a lot!
They buy you things.
You have good feelings when they r around too.
u would know they love u by how they treat u, by their behavior, by their willingness to do certain things for u, but when one gets mistreated, or taken Advantage of i don't think its love anymore.
I think it's when they put your needs before their own. They want you to be happy when they see that you aren't. Problem is they usually don't see those things.
When he will get up off the couch just after he sat down after doing the dishes to bring you a glass of iced tea.
what is love? Maybe after all the lust it is only that, comfort and laziness.
For me, i know my wife loves me because she does a lot of things for me without me asking. And i do that for her as well. We work together, never need to be nagged. We have sex very regularly. Both of us initiate at times so it isn't one sided. We never let each other down. When one needs the other for whatever reason, we are there. To me, all that is love. if they need to be reminded ot be thoughtful of you, or nagged ot be sweet and make love ot you, or find excuses not to come thru, then you can probably question the love in that relationship. Love isn't work. I don't work a day in my life to be with her. It's easy. She is a part of me. So doing for her, is like doing for me.How do you know your spouse really loves you?
You can't ever know.
People can lie. Even to themselves. Many people convince themselves they're in love with someone, because they can't stand the idea of being alone. (or what being alone implies: loser).
The key is: you decide what you will tolerate and what you will not. If you're being abused - it does not matter if you love them or they love you. You MUST protect yourself.
So - ask yourself the following things:
1. Does your spouse ever show GENUINE concern for other people's feelings? (even animals). If the answer is yes, then your spouse is not a psychopath. That's a good thing.
2. Does your spouse try to manipulate others? (lying is a big indicator here, but using sex, or other reward/punishment mechanisms is very indicative of manipulation).
3. Does your spouse abuse you, or others, (or substances, alcohol, drugs), physically, emotionally, verbally? (including - especially cheating). Basically, are they a bully?
If the answer to either of the last two is yes, then it's very likely that they have a damaged ego, and are primarily motivated by fear - and they may believe firmly that they love you, and swear they do, but trust me, they do not. Manipulators and abusers hate themselves. They are pathologically incapable of loving others.
This condition IS curable. Codpendency and Addiction recovery are good programs that can teach someone how to rebuild self esteem. When they love themselves, they can really love others. Of course, this is very oversimplified, and there are a lot of other personality disorder issues or mental illness that can complicate things.
Psychopathy is NOT curable. If the answer to question 1 is no, then get out of there, run like hell.
re: I mean we get so comfortable in a relationship and sometimes we forgive things we shouldn't?
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; That's called CODEPENDENCY.......an ILLNESS! Relationships are more about finding solutions to problems than STUPIDLY forgiving (only to have it happen again and again and again with no solution - ever!)
We're either to scare to move on or we're just too comfortable financially or emotionally accept that it's okay to be mistreated or ignored or taken advantage of.
%26gt;%26gt; And that is a perfect description of CODEPENDENCY!
http://www.google.com/search?client=oper鈥?/a>
....don't worry - it's cureable!
How do we know our spouses really love us?
%26gt;%26gt; You don't! All you will ever know is that it is working or not - depending on your level of relationship skills and KNOWLEDGE. When it's working, you will know.
When he stops at Starbucks on his way home from work to bring you a caramel macchiato, because he knows I won't spend $5 on a coffee for myself.
Or when you wake up at 10 a.m. on a Saturday, because he got up, turned off your alarm, fed the kids and took the dogs out so that you could sleep in.
Little things...just all the little things matter at that point in the relationship...more so than words.
My husband is constantly complementing me.
He is always there for rme no matter what.
He tells me everyday more than once how much he loves me.
He would do anything reasonable that I would ask him to do.
He helps out around the house.
really everything about him tells me that he loves me..And vice versa
Remember, love is a verb, not a feeling. One must actively love someone or they begin to take the companionship for granted. If the two of you are Christians, grab the book The Love Dare. It truly changed my wife's and my relationship for the better.
When he does things on a regular basis that he knows will make you happy. When he has your back and you have his. Our house is the soft place to land at the end of the day.
They show you daily.
They hug you.
THey say i love you often.
They desire you a lot!
They buy you things.
You have good feelings when they r around too.
u would know they love u by how they treat u, by their behavior, by their willingness to do certain things for u, but when one gets mistreated, or taken Advantage of i don't think its love anymore.
I think it's when they put your needs before their own. They want you to be happy when they see that you aren't. Problem is they usually don't see those things.
When he will get up off the couch just after he sat down after doing the dishes to bring you a glass of iced tea.
what is love? Maybe after all the lust it is only that, comfort and laziness.
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